One Year Later
I've been meaning to post this, but kept putting it off.
One year ago on November 3rd, our sweet Eden went back to heaven.
In the past year we have laughed, we have cried and we have held on to the little memories we had while she was with us for that short time.
Matt and I both got tattoos in her memory. Matt got one with a sleeping baby in the Lord's hands with cherry blossoms and her name on his inner forearm. I simply got her name with angel wings colored blue and pink since those are the colors for the pregnancy and infant loss awareness ribbon.
There have been bad days and there have been good days. There are still times I cry over what would have been. To think that instead of being pregnant right now, we would have a 5 month old in the house. But it wasn't meant to be and we are so very excited to meet this new little person God blessed us with.
The pain is still there, I think it always will be. It still stings whenever I think back on those few days when I prayed that God would let our baby stay but also wanted what His plan was for us. And then I still ugly cry when I think back when I was laying on the hospital bed, bleeding out, knowing our baby was gone and there was nothing I could do to save her. I had never felt so helpless in my life.
Hopefully someday I can tell our story without having to stop to let the tears out, right now is not that time and that is ok. It's ok that we still cry over our baby that we have to wait to meet.
We thank God every day for our little Jeremiah. He truly is our blessing. I don't know how we would have made it through this without Jeremiah showing us God's love and that it is ok to laugh when your heart is breaking. I think after loosing Eden, I have loved Jeremiah even deeper. I have loved Matt even deeper.
It's been a long year, but we are making it through, together, as one family united in Christ. God, please give Eden a big hug and kiss from all of us. Keep her in your arm's. Thank you!
One year ago on November 3rd, our sweet Eden went back to heaven.
In the past year we have laughed, we have cried and we have held on to the little memories we had while she was with us for that short time.
Matt and I both got tattoos in her memory. Matt got one with a sleeping baby in the Lord's hands with cherry blossoms and her name on his inner forearm. I simply got her name with angel wings colored blue and pink since those are the colors for the pregnancy and infant loss awareness ribbon.
There have been bad days and there have been good days. There are still times I cry over what would have been. To think that instead of being pregnant right now, we would have a 5 month old in the house. But it wasn't meant to be and we are so very excited to meet this new little person God blessed us with.
The pain is still there, I think it always will be. It still stings whenever I think back on those few days when I prayed that God would let our baby stay but also wanted what His plan was for us. And then I still ugly cry when I think back when I was laying on the hospital bed, bleeding out, knowing our baby was gone and there was nothing I could do to save her. I had never felt so helpless in my life.
Hopefully someday I can tell our story without having to stop to let the tears out, right now is not that time and that is ok. It's ok that we still cry over our baby that we have to wait to meet.
We thank God every day for our little Jeremiah. He truly is our blessing. I don't know how we would have made it through this without Jeremiah showing us God's love and that it is ok to laugh when your heart is breaking. I think after loosing Eden, I have loved Jeremiah even deeper. I have loved Matt even deeper.
It's been a long year, but we are making it through, together, as one family united in Christ. God, please give Eden a big hug and kiss from all of us. Keep her in your arm's. Thank you!
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